Some days ago, I read some disturbing news on my TL. I read about a 9 year-old child that had been sexually assaulted by a 53 year-old neighbour. Realizing the need to sensitize parents and guardians on what to look out for, I approached Mr. Ibrahim Nurudeen, a social worker specializing in Child Protection. Excerpts;
Could you give an insight into your background?
My name is Ibrahim Ayoola Nurudeen. I am a Muslim and the fifth child of a family of seven children. I am an indigene of Abeoukta, Ogun State. I was born and brought up in Zaria and therefore benefitted from the fountain of knowledge which the ancient town is known for. I hold a National Certificate in Education in Computer/Mathematics from FCE Zaria and a Bachelor of Science in Sociology from Ahmadu Bello University, Zaria. Presently, I am pursuing a postgraduate course leading to the award of MSc (Development Studies) from the University of Jos. I am single.
What informed your decision to go into social work?
Social workers are individuals who have chosen to promote the cause of human existence in different ways. This is the drive and motivation for my choice of social work.
What is the name of your organisation?
The name of my organization is SOS Kindorpen International. It’s an international NGO in over 133 countries of the world working to provide support and care for orphans and vulnerable children. I am a Programme Officer in the Family Strengthening Programme, SOS Children’s Village, Kwata-Zawan, Plateau State.
Why have you chosen the field of child protection?
Child protection was an area of focus for me even while I was a teacher for almost 10 years. However, now, I would say that this love is predicated on my work experience which brings me in contact with children in need every now and then, as well as the opportunities for capacity-building at local and international learning forums being supported by my organization. I am very passionate about seeing children grow up with love and care.
What challenges seem to be most persistent?
This would have to be seeing parents who are not willing to take action in protecting their children because they feel they are too poor to do so.
What has been the most daunting challenge so far?
The most daunting challenge is the realization that our communities are fast losing the cultural values that served as safety-nets for the protection of children
In cases of sexual abuse, is it true that it happens to female
children alone, and that all offenders are men?
These questions only reinforce the general myth about child sexual abuse. Sexual abuse is ubiquitous and both male and female children have been/are victims of sexual abuse. Consequently, child sexual offenders have been found among men and women.
Do parents abuse their own children? How can such children be helped?
Evidence abide that some parents have been found wanting in child sexual abuse. However, most parents are abusers when we look at child abuse as a broad term. Children who have been/are being abused by their parents can find help by confiding in their persons-of-trust. Children, as individuals, have certain individuals they have identified and taken as confidants. These POT’s can be any of their parents, aunts, uncles, teachers, etc. It is hoped that these persons-of-trust will not do anything to betray the trust reposed in them by these children vis-a-vis taking action on their behalf.
What is the procedure for helping abused kids - do you prosecute
offenders alone, or do you help the victims recover too?
The procedure for helping abused children starts by identifying their medical needs to ascertain the intensity of the abuse, making the needs available and friendly, as well as, engaging them to say how they feel in order to know the nature of psychotherapy services they may require after medical treatments. Helping abused children also includes helping them to make sure their abusers are made to face the full wrath of the law.
What is the conviction rate for sexual offenders? Is justice always served?
The rate of conviction is still very low but it is envisaged that the advocacy on child rights’ act would go a long way in bringing the plight of abused children to the fore in our justice system.
Is it true that early sexual exposure/abuse could lead to promiscuity?
The cultivation of or exposure to any behavioral pattern goes along way in the definition of the personality that would be made in the future. Early exposure to sex has the potency to birth a pervert later in life. This informs the need for an all encompassing treatment for the abused.
What would you suggest that parents/guardians of such children who become promiscuous as a result of being abused do?
Engaging them in positive activities and teaching them life skills would go along way in helping them check the negative consequence of sexual abuse.
What steps would you advise parents to take in order to protect their
children from sexual predators and pedophiles?
Parents must maintain close-knit relationships with their children in order for these children to have self-confidence, look inward for love and other needs, etc. In the same vein, building children’s ability to share whatever they experience outside the home is very important. Teach them to say everything. Parents must begin to create the awareness about sex and sexuality life from the home and it must be done systematically. Also, parents should ensure that their children do not cultivate the habit of calling everyone ‘uncle’ or ‘aunty’. The disadvantage of this is that in case anything happens, the child may not be able to identify the culprit.
Is there any case in particular that really affected you, or one you
feel you will never be able to forget? If yes, could you please share?
I once met a 12 year old girl who told me about her uncontrollable desire for sex which started since she was abused by a 14 year old boy when she was just 8 years old. She now finds sex irresistible, and always finds the urge quite strong. Presently, she is undergoing rehabilitation.
Would you say that your experiences with respect to your chosen field
have had any effects on your personal life?
Yes, I would. I now see marriage and parenting as far more than just the affair between a man and a woman who want to ‘enjoy’ each other but have not made enough provisions to cater for the outcome of this enjoyment. Parents always have their share of blame in most cases of abuse that I have come across. Children will be more protected if parents can provide the enabling environment for them to grow.
If there’s one thing that would make putting an end to child abuse in
Nigeria easier, what would it be, and how can it be achieved?
An end to child sexual abuse can only happen in the utopian world we all carry in our heads because it is becoming a more complex issue by the day. However, prosecuting offenders can serve as deterrent to others. As such, strengthening our legal system in not tolerating cases of abuse will be required. Parents must be accountable in the care and support they provide for their children. Our communities’ safety-nets must also be re-engineered to work in the interest of children.
You may further engage Mr. Nurudeen on @ibroayo
Rinsola Abiola.